Confession #4179

#4179 103

My father loved me and hurt me
Made me experience words can build and break
Though polygamy he made me hate marriage due to witnessing what physical and emotional abuse is and what it did to my mother

I developed PTSD and severe anxiety after going through Kenyan court system during my parent separation and maintenance cases
This anxiety course is life changing for me.
I cut our relationship before he died due to toxicity my family never understood so when he died I didn’t know how to mourn because I had buried him when he was still alive.

He taught me love for books ..
He taught me about loyalty to those you value
He tried to right his wrongs to his children
When I think about him now am peaceful,I smile I cry am healing he is done with his purpose here now I need to accomplish mine.

Other father figures and male influences in my life have been awesome am grateful for my grand father and uncles who loved and still love me so much
My friend’s dad who was a father figure to me in high school

Amazing men I met in college who loved and protected me as a kid sister.

Now I have an amazing son am intentionally being a awesome mother I will not pass my wounds and bleed on him

September 3, 2023 |
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